Rice Babies and Sweet Friend

Background

In 1st Grade there is a very special project in which 1st graders make Rice Babies that weigh as much as the 1st grader did when they were born and are "decorated" to look like the 1st grader. The 1st graders name them, make birth certificates, etc. Oldest Son named his Mitchell and feels very passionate about Mitchell. Well, Mitchell went through some rough times lately (like Youngest Son cutting Mitchell with scissors which is a whole different topic.) We could not take him to Mexico and could not Store 7 lbs of rice. I had not figured out what to do. Oldest Son was not ready to "let Mitchell go."

Sweet Friend

On our last night in town, Sweet Friend gathered Mitchell in a basket and told me she would "foster" him for the year. Then I got this amazing email from Sweet Friend which literally made me cry and brought the biggest smile to Oldest Son's face:

"Mitchell has settled in very well to his new home. We performed a little “minor surgery” – cleaning up his wounds. I put clear nail polish around the “runs” on his face in hopes of preventing further damage. I also removed the duct tape (probably not the best idea) and replaced it with clear packing tape (it looks better, but doesn’t stick very well). The original “hole” was “repaired” with band aids (but those don’t stick very well either). We compared him to Sweet Friend Son's rice baby (he was a heavy 9 lbs. 2 oz) and Sweet Friend Son couldn’t believe how heavy he had been!

I carefully placed him back in his red “Moses” basket on top of a comfy blue baby blanket, and did the same for Sweet Friend Son's baby (in a separate basket) and put them side by side in our bar. (At least for now)! I don’t plan on moving him until you return, so tell Oldest Son that he is very happy in his new home and we will take good care of him until he gets back next summer. We will then give up our “guardianship” and return him to his proper home. No worries! "

Isn't friendship great! For Oldest Son, Mitchell and Me!

Soapbox: Too Much, Too Early

Soapbox = You may not want to read this posting because I may offend you with the opinion I am about to give ...

There are many reasons we are in Mexico for 1 year. One is to Slow Down. We started Oldest Son on the socialization track at age 4. By age 8 - he had played 10 soccer seasons, 4 baseball seasons and countless other activities and events. Then came Youngest Son and we started the same thing with him. So now we had twice the number of events.

We eventually stopped the many camping trips we had always taken since kids born. We stopped going to museums, zoos, aquariums, concerts ... our weekends were always booked. The kids are only 8 and 6!!!

No Extracurricular Activities in Mexico. That is the rule. We want our weekends back!

Yes, you are right. We CHOSE to do all those activities. You are so right. Mia Culpa. Do not get me wrong. Our kids are well rounded and we all had many, many fun wonderful experiences. More importantly, we all made many special friends through these years. But. I am tired.

So, how is it going so far? The kids have No Activities. These are my observations in just over one week:

- Play: The kids are having a great time playing together. They have not complained once. And we are not at the pool or beach all the time - adults still have to work.

- Chores: We have set higher expectations on their contributions to household chores. They are meeting and exceeding expectations. I think the biggest barrier in USA is we were just moving so fast from one event to the other that it was easier for us to just do it. Kids take longer. You have to Give Them the Time.

- Jewish Home Rituals: We have celebrated Shabbat and Havdalah faithfully. Oldest Son is reading the Shabbat Prayer book and we DANCED after Shabbat last night - around and around. We never did Havdalah in USA. We usually had something going on Saturdays or were just too tired. Youngest Son eagerly prompted us tonight for Havdalah.

- Reading: Husband is reading a Spanish book every night to Kids. Oldest Son then reads his book of choice silently (he has read 8 books in the series Animorphs since we arrived.) I read an English book to Youngest Son as we snuggle in his bed. We are reading about Juan Bobo (Puerto Rico folk tales.) Juan Bobo is naughty like Youngest Son so Youngest Son loves it! I personally have finished a book just for me and have started a 2nd.

- Family Outings: We spent entire day just hanging out at local village and beach. No agenda. Youngest Son sang like 8 verses of "She'll Be Coming Around the Mountain" on our way. I was just so thrilled to be there to listen. Oldest Son found Rubber Ball in ocean. He was so proud. Kids played and played with it outside when we got home. So what? In USA they had several balls just like this - the difference is Oldest Son acquired it himself in an "adventure."

I think we just start too much too early in USA. I am all for enriching our kids. But do we have to start at age 4? Could we just wait until say 10?

So - we will continue to see how this evolves for our family in Mexico.

And ultimately, we will see how it affects our lives upon return in a year.

Not sure how this particular Soapbox will play out. I am always open to learnings and change.

Overheard: Life

Youngest Son: "Today is a Good Day."

Me: "Why is today a Good Day?"

Youngest Son: "Everyday is a Good Day."

Duh - That pretty much says it all ... Youngest Son truly approaches everyday this way with Spirit, Adventure and Fun.

Sunrise

Sunrise this morning from our balcony ...

1st Playdate

I am so excited to be back in Mexico! Nice to come Home.

So Kids had first playdate today! I was not here yet but Husband and Kids told me about it. Our Housekeeper's son Ricardo who is 9 came with her today. Ricardo only speaks Spanish. Kids swam and played. There was not a ton of verbal interaction but it is a start. Ricardo and Kids seemed to have fun. According to Youngest Son, Youngest Son understood everything Ricardo said ... not quite ... but I appreciate the enthusiasm.

Did I say mention how nice was to be Home? The flight into airport was beautiful. Everything is so green.

Last Pieces of Puzzle

So we are down to the last pieces of the puzzle for our Move to Mexico.

RENT HOUSE - This is a huge middle, piece with big fat $$$$ signs going "down the tubes." I am starting to get financially antsy. And yes I still have several "get house emptied" tasks there never seem to end.

US HEALTH INSURANCE - This is medium sized red piece that is really important. We need to have major medical in US to keep credible coverage certificates and for any major health issues we may have to treat in US. Husband has some health conditions making this difficult. Looks like we will drop kids & me off COBRA, file a Qualified Status Change on COBRA to Husband Only and when expires in October Husband will go into State Pool. Sounds complicated - it is.

MEXICO HEALTH INSURANCE - A corner piece. Gotta get some kind of policy in Mexico too. Husband working on it.

It has been strange to be in USA home while family is in Mexico. I get confused when referring to here or there or home. Which is it? Is here there? Is there here? And where is home for me since I will be back and forth.

By the way, Husband has recovered but was sick for about 36 hours. I hear from Husband that Kids were great. I miss them. Allot.

Back in the Good Ole USA

In USA
I flew from Mexico to USA this morning for my first official commute to work in USA. I will return periodically to work onsite at the organization in which I provide contract assistance.

This will be a very, very busy week. I have lots of contract work and I am still working on clearing closets in our USA house. It is still not rented. The house is completely cleared except for a desk, desk chair and couch in office. This will be where I live until Thursday. My Amazing Neighbors took me out for pasta tonight - yummy.

Hep A & B Shots
The timing for this trip back was good in that I can get Round 2 of Hep A & B shots tomorrow afternoon with my regular doctor's office.

Uh Oh - First Intestinal Issues
Our family has been hit with its first bout of intestinal issues. Husband texted me that his tuna from lunch was creating some pretty bad sickness this afternoon. Yucky - poor guy - sick and in Mexico with kids alone. Not fun.

Shabbat Shalom

Tonight was Shabbat. I want to savor Shabbat while we are in Mexico. Take a bit more time - no rushing.

• We lit the candles and recited the prayers in Hebrew:

Barukh atah Adonai, Eloheinu, melekh ha'olam

Blessed are you, Lord, our God, sovereign of the universe

asher kidishanu b'mitz'votav v'tzivanu

Who has sanctified us with His commandments and commanded us

l'had'lik neir shel Shabbat. (Amein)

to light the lights of Shabbat. (Amen)

• We lift our Kiddush cups to drink the wine (lemonade for the kids):

Barukh atah Adonai, Eloheinu, melekh ha-olam

Blessed are you, Lord, our God, sovereign of the universe

borei p'ri hagafen (Amein)

Who creates the fruit of the vine (Amen)

• We sing the Ha-Motzi with Youngest Son lifting the "challah" wrapped in the challah cover:

Hamotzi lechem min ha'aretz

We give thanks to God for bread

Our voices join in song together

As our joyful prayer is said:

Barukh atah Adonai, Eloheinu, melekh ha-olam

Blessed are You, Lord, our God, King of the Universe

hamotzi lechem min ha'aretz. (Amein).

who brings forth bread from the earth. (Amen)

• Oldest Son reads Gates of Wonder to us which is a book of Prayers for Young Children by Rabbi Howard Bogot and Rabbi Robert Orkand. It covers rainbows, night and day, the differences found in people, Shabbat, and the Torah. It is beautifully illustrated.

• Finally, we have a special Mitzvah to celebrate. We affix (with scotch tape to be respectful of actual owner) a Mezuzah the doorframe of our new Jewish home to fulfill biblical commandment to inscribe the words of the Shema "on the doorposts of your house." (Deuteronomy 6:9) This Mezuzah is special. Youngest Son made it in Religious School last year during a special class in which I participated. I put it away at that time just for tonight.

Baruch atta Adonai Eloheinu melech ha‘olam, asher kideshanu bemitzvotav vetzivanu likboa‘ mezuza.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the Universe, Who sanctified us with His mitzvot, and commanded us to affix a mezuzah.

During the entire set of rituals we had God's beauty out our back door.

Fishing Story

Youngest Son and I wander to the beach this evening. There is a group of rocks that juts out from beach. We had seen kids fishing down there through the afternoon.

The Eel
There is a young, local woman with 7 children ranging in ages from 3 to 10. They are grouped around something long. At first I thought it was a snake but it was an eel! They had caught it and now could not get it off the hook. One of the 10 year old boys goes to get a big knife and they start trying to cut it off - clearly trying to save the hook. Eventual success. Youngest Son takes closer look at eel.

The Fishing Tools
You might assume the fishing was with fishing rods. Uh, no. Plastic bottles with fishing line wrapped around it with a weight and hook at end. They are using chunks of fish cut from the small fish (about 8 inches long) they have brought with them. One 6 year old boy had his fishing line wound about a flat piece of wood.

The Octopus
We look up to see a man swimming into the beach. As he surfaces, he has a dive mask, back pack and crow bar looking item with hook on end. We move in closer. He pulls 2 octopuses from his back pack. One is alive and one appears to be dead. Youngest Son tentatively touches the live one. I am fairly certain the octopus is dinner tonight.

What a nice way to end the day.

Setting Up Our Household

Setting up our Mexican Household has been good. We have consciously chosen to approach differently than we would in the USA.

Our furnished villa is wonderful: 3 bedrooms (2 quite big), a nice size common living area with kitchen, dining and den, 2 1/2 bathes, laundry closet and 2 car garage. Even so we do not have everything we like or even need.

In the USA, we have this way of life that you have individual items for every need. In general, we do not multi-purpose furniture and everyday living items. There are retail establishments everywhere to meet your every whim. Need a special color - choose from 15 colors; need it smaller - no problem, need it special made - you bet, on and on and on ...

In our Villa, we are trying very, very hard to purchase very little. We have bought plastic bookshelves (we brought so many books!), charcoal grill (must for Husband who loves to cook), kitchen trash can, bed "egg crates", ice cream scoop (honestly the spoons bent when I used what was here) and 1 set of linens. The bed "egg crates" we could have probably done without but mattresses are quite firm.

We did get 4 plastic cups. Husband wrote our names on them with Sharpie and now these are cups for the day for each family member.

We have repurposed:

• 2 Large Decorative Tables - Now 2 Desks
• Nightstand - Now TV stand
• Master Bedroom - Now Master Bedroom, my Offfice and Husband's Office
• 2 Outdoor Chairs - Now 2 Desk Chairs
• Large Plastic Storage Container we moved stuff with - Now Toy Chest
• 2 TV tables - Now Tables for Oldest Son and Youngest Son to keep their stuff
• Staircase Rails - Now Laundry Line for wet clothes to dry
• Decorative Basket - Now Art Supplies Holder
• Decorative Bowl for Fake Fruit - Now Real Fruit Bowl (fake stuff in top of closet)
• Coffee Table - Now Play Table for kids
• Guest Room - Now Media Room with DVD Player we brought from USA
• Guest Room Closet - Now Game Closet
• Guest Room Lamp - Now my Desk Lamp
• Plastic DVD Holder - Now Bread Storage
• Beach Towels - Now Throw Blankets all Over Villa

We are trying to simplify. Make do. Be creative. I have found I am oddly stimulated to figure out how to make it all work - so much more fulfilling than to just go buy another thing.

Flushing the Toilet - Who Knew?

USA - You hit the flusher and instantly it flushes - maybe 1 Second.

Mexico - You hit the flusher, HOLD for a solid 3 Seconds and it flushes.

I think the message is obvious - "slow down, enjoy the moment" - even the mundane things in life.

Living In Mexico: Medicine Delimma

I expect we will run into many challenges that surround living in a different country and not speaking the language fluently.

Oldest Son woke up with fever today along with some vomiting. We have a few Junior Strength Motrin tablets that we started giving him. Husband purchased Motrin Suspension Infantil and Tylenol Infantil at local store. The dosage dispenser only goes to child's weight of 15 kg.

Dilemma: Doesn't Infantil mean Infant? Oldest Son is 8 and 50 lbs/22.7 kg.

Well yes but the other choices in Mexico appear to be Pediatric (which seemed to be for babies) and Adult versions. There does not seem to be Junior or Children's versions exactly.

Oh Mannnn. I spent 45 minutes surfing the internet in English and Spanish to make sure we are using correct dosage. Thank goodness for Babel Fish translation.

Conclusion: The Motrin Suspension Infantil is 20 mg/1 ml which is same as Children's Motrin 100 mg/5 mL. So we just have to add dosages together to get to the 10 mL.

Not sure what we will do if we need to take Oldest Son to doctor - no doubt we will figure it out.

School, Panic, Relief

We took both children to School today as we were told that there would be some kind of extra help this week in the mornings for kids who did not speak Spanish. Honestly, it was unclear whether it was for both kids or just Oldest Son and we really did not know what it was.

We arrived. The Principal obviously did not know who we were and did not remember we would be there. She asked about their Spanish and I erroneously gave the impression they could not speak Spanish at all. She indicated they could not go to school there since much of day was in Spanish and those teachers do not speak English. I had a moment of panic. Oh My Gosh - what are we going to do? Fortunately School Administrator explained who were and Husband entered conversation. All was okay.

As it turns out, session is only for Oldest Son since he is entering 3rd Grade (Youngest Son going to K3.) It is 1 hour of tutoring. We leave Oldest Son at School. I know he is a bit nervous. Oldest Son understands Spanish quite well and speaks with a beautiful accent but he is not conversational yet.

When Husband picks him up, Principal is complementary (guess kids get to go to school after all!) He was in tutoring with one other little girl who is learning English. It worked out nicely. She can help Oldest Son with Spanish and him with her English. Oldest Son has homework and returns each day this week at 10 am.

We are grateful for any extra help with Spanish before the kids start School on August 18th.

Husband is doing great with his Spanish. I am afraid Spanish is going to be very, very difficult for me.

Here, Here, Here

We arrived last night at around 7:00 pm. Other than a bit of car sickness from Youngest Son (lots and lots of winding mountainous road with breathtaking views) we had an uneventful, long day of driving.

We celebrated at local restaurant. The big hit: OCTOPUS! Oldest Son and Youngest Son proclaimed to love eating the tentacles with "suckers." They also brought home limes from tree growing beside our table.

We are happy to be here and a bit weary. Husband is setting up all the technology now.

Over the Border

Mazel Tov! - Today
We are here in Mexico again! We crossed the border easily. Border Patrol did direct us over for inspection but they looked at couple items and sent us on our way - 3 minutes at the most. No questions about the Car Permit on our windshield (that we should have turned in 2 weeks ago when leaving Mexico.) Perhaps it was the Mexico National Futbol shirt Husband had on ...

So we arrived at the Hampton Inn in Saltillo at 7:00 pm, ate dinner next door, bathed and in comfortable beds by 8:15 pm. We had a family toast at dinner - To Life! La Chaim! A La Vida! - milk for kids, cervaza for me and tequila for Husband.

"The Roof Raising" - Yesterday
To say the last couple of weeks in USA have been rough, stressful and tiring would be a huge understatement.

Yesterday was very special. First, I called College Friend in desperation since the young man we had hired to help us had to leave early. She came over immediately. She picked up our new mirror and the dry cleaning, attached ceiling fan lights and blades, installed vents and blinds, sorted through "stuff" and kept me sane.

Second, many of our closest Friends came over with their own dinner (and ours too) to let kids swim and play and say good bye. They came bearing goodies, cards and well wishes. They all pitched in to help us in this final push.

The car was packed with boxes and then "tons" of items left to cram into all the in between space. I thought there was no way. In less than 10 minutes, our spatially gifted friends had loaded every single item! I do not think there was a square inch not utilized. I was shocked, amazed, impressed, relieved and grateful.

Friends went with Husband to storage, swept the garage, hung and sorted stuff, watched kids, cleaned floors and much more.

My very Sweet Friend came up to me with Oldest Son's Rice Baby in a basket. She said she would foster him for a year. I wanted to cry. (See April 9th Blog Posting)

All my girlfriends went "shopping" taking cleaning items, toiletries and gift wrap stuff I could not take to Mexico or donate and did not want to through away.

Our Special Friends stayed until 10:30 helping to the bitter end.

Youngest Son spent the night next door, Oldest Son and I spent night across the street and Husband in our house. Thank goodness for caring neighbors!

There was Chaos, Friendship and Love. It was like an Old Fashioned Barn Raising where everyone comes together to help their neighbors, family and friends. There could not have been a more perfect send off.